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Why you should never google symptoms..




It's the day of the royal wedding and I have to take Cameron with me to my lovely friend Rhian's wedding dress try-on.

This is because Paul is really poorly. High blood pressure, horrible headache and thirst like you would not believe!!

I felt rotten leaving him.. but he insisted.

My gorgeous friend Nic relieved Cam's boredom by going out of her way to picking him up and took him home to play with his pal Bailey. I could've cried. She is amazing.. always asking how P is and going the extra mile.

Next thing i know Paul is off to get his bloods tested. As is often the case, he was neutropenic.. when the white blood cell count is low. He had to stay at Parkside overnight for further monitoring and got an injection to boost cell counts.

I felt a bit upset about not being with him and my friend Gen came over out of the blue before her night out just to check in on me. She even read Cam a story and put him to bed for me.

Paul seemed okay and didn't really sense anything was up but if you're an idiot like me and google "mesothelioma, high blood pressure, headache, thirst" it immediately suggests that it has metastasized to the brain. 2 and 2 became 8 in my head and I felt a bit desperate. Didn't sleep all night and Gen very kindly had Cam the next day (despite her throbbing hangover - what a legend! LOVE YOU GEN!) so I could speed to the hospital.

When we were told the results had come back and that Mary our oncologist was coming into see us (it was a Sunday) I must admit I felt a bit sick..Why would she come in if everything ok??!

When Mary came in at 2pm (it had felt like the longest morning in the world) and said his bloods were better and that she thought it was just side effects of the avastin, I could have jumped on her with glee.

She was brilliant. Cut through the nonsense and explained everything to us. She'd come from the airport - completely out of her way.

We walked over to Wimbledon common and sat on the grass. (Big exhales!)

Paul has a booking with a cardiologist this week to explore why his BP and heart rate keeps spiking.

It's lovely to see the relationship Paul has with Mary.

We are very fortunate indeed.


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